Front Porch

a new addition to our humble family abode, our front porch is something i am rapidly becoming fonder and fonder of. today, as the sun beat heavy on it, the porch soaked it all up, so when i laid down on it, i was instantly rewarded with a flood of warmth. speaking of the warmth of the sun... go here: http://www.myspace.com/matthewthiessenandtheearthquakes tis a spiffy song, the first one.
anyways, back to the porch... sighing in pleasure, i curled up in a ball, and prepared to nap.
sadly, this preparation was a wee bit immature. immediately, a swarm of children came and began clawing at each other, directly over my head. now, why they couldn't have tried to kill each other two or three feet away is beyond me, but apparently, they just needed to make sure they were murdering each other whilst being supervised. swatting at them to go away, i curled up tighter, and managed to ignore them enough to fall asleep. i woke up a little while later to a grinning face, smeared with peanut butter and crumbs. eager to show me his latest 'magic trick', the owner of the aforesaid face downed two pieces of toast in record time. i was apparently not impressed enough, so i was punished for this insolence by getting dandelion fluff blown on me for a goodly length of time. still not wanting to move, i remained in my fetal position, until the dog came and began licking my face with great vigor. i then sat up, shedding a fleet of fluff as i did so, and listened to my companion as he began to speak.
he told me lots of things. he first told me the life stories of every one of his chickens, all of whom he missed, because they had just been sold. he told me their names, their personalities, each and every one of their peculiar habits. my heart broke for him, because he misses them so much. then, somehow, the subject got switched to bears, and he demonstrated how he would run from them if they came for him. his plan was to hide behind the screen door. i informed him that the bear would probably be able to get to him, but he was undeterred. i hope he never meets any bears.
after a while, he stopped talking, and began a competition with someone else. now this competition was quite unlike anything i had ever seen before, yet strangely familiar. they would spit into the air, and then run right underneath it, and somehow catch it in their mouth. i have no idea how they did that. personally, it would splat all over my face if i tried that, but they seemed mostly successful.
anyways. sailing right along...
i successfully unearthed my concert tickets that i previously thought i threw away. about three weeks ago, i completely gutted my room and threw EVERYTHING away. it was a good thorough job, and now i know where nothing is, but hey, at least it is (was) clean. however, much to my chagrin, i realized i couldn't find my tickets! now, this would typically not be such a big deal, but these suckers cost me a lot of money, so i was getting pretty agitated. after looking through all my remained stuff items, i was ready to give up. then, i had a sudden inspiration. i descended into my sock drawer, and sure enough, there they were!! remember, if ever in doubt, look in your sock drawer, strange things end up there.

and with that parting piece of advice, i shall take my leave.

~m.r.p.